Y’all, I’m sleepy.

This week I adjusted my schedule because I’m attending a three-day virtual seminar. It’s with my spiritual community so I’m super stoked about it. But I knew I would need to be ready with my collage a little early. I would need to plan ahead. 

I’ll start reading early, I thought. And I did. I’ll do something more random so it will go quickly, I said to self. And then I turned a page and there was ALL THIS COLOR. And then I turned another page and there was MORE OF THIS COLOR. Whatever made me think that doing a “random” design of approximately twelve basquillion half-inch squares would go quickly???

I didn’t actually think it would go quickly. It just was the design I was craving. And let’s face it. My name is Dina, and I am powerless over color. 

I’ve wanted to do a collage out of little squares for a long time. I love the notion of a photograph being composed of countless tiny pixels—little building blocks that you can only distinguish if you zoom way in. 

So this pixelated image is my tribute to July 4th.

“But, Dina, there’s no red, white, and blue.” Yeah, no. Remember when I said I was addicted to color? Not those colors. And that’s not a commentary on patriotism. In my mind, red is for school colors—my high school was red and white, my college, red and black. Red, white, and blue belong on the flags of so many countries. I’m just not inclined to make art with that combo. Not that it was even an option in this issue from May 13, 2019. 

“But, Dina, what on earth does this image have to do with Independence Day?”

Thanks for asking. I’ve been thinking about independence. I think we’re obsessed with it, as a culture. Generally speaking. We fought for it as a country. We love our freedoms. We don’t like others telling us what to do. Rugged individualism.

I think about the development of a child through the teen years. I don’t have kids of my own, but don’t we have a need to distinguish ourselves from our parents as we enter our teen years? We’re seeking independence. Our own likes and dislikes, our own opinions. It’s a natural phase of development.

What happens when we take this independence to its rugged extreme? To each his own, sure, but If I zoom way in to focus only on my own pixel, I lose sight of the bigger picture. 

How do we find that balance? Individualism within the greater whole? 

I would like to think that our country is moving out of its teenage years, that we are remembering we’re all actually in this dream together. We have our independence, but what’s wrong with also needing each other? I think this pandemic is shining a spotlight on our interconnectedness. We are all part of a greater whole. We need each other. 

But in The Patriarchy, need equals weakness. Walking Buddy Wanda shared with me an interesting idea she came across about The Patriarchy. When we talk about “Patriarchy,” we’re not talking about masculinity. We’re talking about a toxic appropriation of masculinity. And women as well as men can buy into it.

I think it’s that toxic masculinity that can’t abide neediness. I can’t depend on anyone else. I need to do for myself. Bootstraps, and all that. I have been guilty of holding that belief.

Oddly enough, it was working in the restaurant industry that helped me bust out of that box. When servers ask each other for help, the whole machine runs much more smoothly and efficiently.

And speaking of boxes . . . squares? Four-sided shapes? July Fourth? Alright, it’s a stretch, but just work with me, people! 

So I present my pink and yellow Independence Day collage. I hope your screen gives you the fullness of the color as I see it in the actual piece. 

I also hope you have a wonderful holiday weekend and can find a way to create your own independent fireworks. 

Know that I love you. And I need you. I also need a nap. Sweet dreams!

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